Anchorman: The Legend Of Ron Burgundy
Starring: Will Ferrell, Christina Applegate
Directed by: Adam McKay
Rating: 4 (out of 5)
Check out Naked's uncensored review as well as images and the trailer on his new website:
THENAKEDCRITIC.COM
Welcome to the one and only news source you can trust…thenakedcritic.com. Sure, it's not a "news
source", per se, but I have a lot in common with many of the world's great newsmen. Dan Rather, Peter Jennings, Sam Donaldson…and
the Naked Critic. We're cut from the same cloth. For example:
- Most people will only ever see me from the waist up. For the others, it's a matter of framing. For me, it's a matter of a court order
demanding that I stop exposing myself on public transportation.
- You can TRUST me, just like you can trust the other anchors mentioned. If they say that John Edwards is John Kerry's running-mate, you
can trust them (Are you paying attention, New York Post?) If I tell you that Soul Plane is a horrific, bowl-winding turd of a movie, you
can trust that too.
- I share their individual traits as well. Like Jennings, I'm Canadian. Like Rather, I'm batshit insane. And like Donaldson, corpses
occasionally turn up on my property.
But, and this isn't false modesty talking here…I am no Ron Burgundy. Sure, we both love scotch, we both talk to our pets, and we both
think Christina Applegate is hot. But, I lack the sheer MANLIHOOD of Burgundy. I've got a ratty, graying goatee…he's got a trim,
porn-star mustache (and offering "goatee rides" to women just doesn't have the same ring to it.) His hair is solid, warm, and
inviting, whereas mine often resembles Saddam Hussein's spider-hole beard. And, most importantly, Ron Burgundy soothes people…whereas
I tend to make them nervous, skittish, or downright frightened.
Then again, I have some similarities with Will Ferrell, who plays Burgundy in Anchorman. We're both very tall, we both look awkward reading
from cue cards, and we both think that the contestants on Celebrity Jeopardy are idiots.
Stop me before I compare myself to somebody else. Let's just get to the movie.
Anchorman is set in San Diego in the 1970's. As we meet the cast, we learn that Ron Burgundy is the most trusted and loved man in the local
news game. His trusted compatriots include Brain Fontana (Paul Rudd), Sports reporter Champ Kind (David Koechner), and dim-witted
weatherman Brick Tamland (Steve Carell…who I'll be mentioning much more later.)
So, all is great in the world of the Channel 4 news department. The ratings are top-notch, despite the fact that if you rubbed their
collective heads together, you'd barely get enough friction built up to create sound. But, since almost everyone in the movie seems to be
at least a suit shy of a deck, it makes the whole thing that much funnier.
But all will not remain well for the Channel 4 team. See, there's a new reporter in town, in the guise of Veronica Corningstone
(Applegate). Not only is she smoking hot, in a more-conservative-version-of-that-Farrah-poster-that-gave-me-my-first-erection kind of way,
but she's actually quite intelligent and a solid reporter.
Well, the guys immediately lash out at this new intruder. After all, as we all know, broads don't belong in broadcasting…am I right,
guys? Huh? Yeah…you know what I'm talking about…shit…here comes Morn.
…oh, Hi Morn. Hmm? Oh, I'm just working on my Anchorman review. Yeah, it's going ok…no, I don't think you want to read it, 'cause
you see…wait, stop, don't read that part! Ah, well you see, I was…that whole "broads don't belong in broadcasting"
thing is a joke! Yeah…you know…a funny…hey, what are you doing with that frying pan? Are you going to make me some eggs or
something? Because as long as you're cooking I'd (CLANG!)
(One concussion later…)
Oh MAMA does that hurt.
So, as I was saying before I made that ill-advised, sexist joke, Veronica joins the team, but receives a lot of resistance from the
horrible, sexist members of the Channel 4 crew. But, at the same time, Burgundy is fascinated and entranced by her, and they begin to
date.
Ah, but for them to simply fall in love is too easy. For starters, we're only about 15 minutes into the movie. And secondly, and more
importantly, Veronica has an IQ that is well above room temperature. Meanwhile Burgundy's is hovering in the mid-90's (cooler by the lake),
which still makes him brighter than his co-workers…which is why he's the Anchor, and they're the team.
Not for long, pal. After Veronica fills in for Burgundy one day, everyone sees how competent she is, and she's instantly made co-anchor. In
a normal, healthy relationship, this would be a challenge at worst and a dream-come-true at best. But remember, this is set in the 70's,
gang. They worshipped fondue, for f**k's sake. The only thing separating Burgundy and the other guys in the movie from Neanderthals is the
ability to boil cheese over an open flame.
So, "The game is afoot", as Sherlock Holmes would say. Or, to be closer to the period, "Oh, just one more thing" as
Columbo would say. Burgundy and Veronica go from lovers to haters…bitter jealousy and sexism comes into play…and…
I can't do this.
Look, this movie has all the actual PLOT of an episode of "Home Improvement". Guy acts like chauvinistic ass, guy pisses off
girl, and gets pissed off himself. Guy realizes that girl is right, but still manages to behave like a dick, but girl sees he's not so bad.
The only thing missing is a faceless neighbour over a fence dispensing sage advice which can later be misquoted. This isn't
"Network"…hell, it's not even "Broadcast News" or "The Mary Tyler Moore Show".
But it soooo doesn't matter.
This is one of the most consistently funny movies I've seen in a long, long time. It's silly, goofy, and - at times - even retarded. But
everyone involved with it seems to know this, and somehow, that makes it all worthwhile.
Let me put it to you this way…"Anchorman" is set in the '70's, probably the most mock-able decade in decade history. Yet,
other than the attitudes present, they very rarely mock the decade itself. They spend too much time mocking themselves. And it proves, if
nothing else, that Will Ferrell is funny as hell. He imbues this character with this wild, likable, manic energy, expressing surprise by
saying things like "BY THE BEARD OF ODIN!" which cracked me up every time.
Burgundy will also read ANYTHING typed into a TelePrompTer…literally anything. And he's so clueless, he doesn't realize or retain what
it is that he said. This is funny for very, very personal reasons, which I won't go into here. Let me just say this…I know at least
THREE people who can read stuff off of a TelePrompTer, and not have the slightest clue what they've said. If you ask them what they were
talking about on their show that day, they smile and say "F**ked if I know." This is why I was laughing like a mental patient
during these scenes…everyone else thought it was far-fetched, but I can tell you for a FACT that it's common. Trust me.
Yes, I'm aware of the fact that I'm saying this about Will Ferrell, a man whom I couldn't stand until I saw "Old School". What
can I say…it was those retarded Cheerleaders sketches on SNL…they were the un-funniest thing on TV since Full House went off the
air.
He's got a great support team in this movie as well. Applegate is charming (and remains, to this day, the only actress ever to be
immortalized in song by PM Dawn), and Koechner and Rudd are both fine. But the standout…the absolute STAR of this movie for me, was
Steve Carell. Brick Tamland could very well be one of the funniest characters ever committed to film. I've always been a fan…I
consider "The Daily Show" to be one of the funniest shows in TV history, and when he pops up in movies, he's normally pretty
good. I'm even cautiously optimistic about the American remake of the brilliant Brit show "The Office", although I can't quite
see Carell in the Ricky Gervais role.
But here, oh my friends, he is PERFECT. His timing - excellent. His lines - perfect. His delivery - top notch. The dazed look on his face
in every single scene…priceless. I will very likely be paying to see this movie in the theater again…and Carell alone is worth
the admission price. It's not easy to steal scenes from people like Will Ferrell, but it got to the point where any time Carell was on
screen, the audience was laughing. Even when he didn't say anything.
There are some fantastic cameos in the movie, too. Ben Stiller, Vince Vaughn, Luke Wilson, and Tim Robbins all show up in what could be one
of the balls-out silliest fight scenes ever (a scene that was also the source of Carell's two biggest laughs, I might add).
The way I see it, the overall success of the movie can be attributed to two main factors. One is the use of improv. Ferrell is a gifted
improviser who cut his teeth with the legendary "Groundlings" troupe. Director McKay taught it, as well. As a result, they would
often just clown around on the set, making stuff up, and seeing what worked. I can pretty much guarantee that the funniest scenes came from
that improv. The other thing is FUN. If I was a gambling man (I only gamble with my health) I'd bet that everybody from the stars to the
grips to the craft services people had the time of their lives working on this movie. And that kind of fun is infectious…it comes
across, the audience can feel it, and it becomes contagious.
The movie also gets bonus points for including a blooper reel over the credits. These outtakes are even funnier than the movie itself.
Apparently, the first cut of the movie was almost 3 hours long, so that's good news for DVD fans…between deleted stuff and outtakes, I
can pretty much guarantee that this will be a must-own.
Overall, this could be one of the best times you have at the movies all summer…as long as you like dumb, exaggerated humor, you can't
go wrong.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to see what's taking Morn so long with those eggs. It's not like she doesn't like cooking for me or
anything…after all, a woman's place is in the kit(CLANG!)
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